Mpumalanga denies it is banana province as last bananas stolen
The premier of Mpumalanga has denied that he rules a corrupt "banana province", saying that in order to be a banana province you need bananas and all his bananas have been stolen or turned into frogs by witches. Meanwhile he has offered his condolences to another rival who was the victim of a drive-by suicide.
De Lille, Zille to be fused into Mega-Tannie De Zille
Following reports last week that the Independent Democrats and the Democratic Alliance are in talks to form an opposition coalition, spokespeople from both parties have confirmed that leaders Patricia de Lille and Helen Zille are to be spliced together into a single opposition Mega-Tannie named De Zille.
Apple to launch iPedi in SA
Hot on the heels of the launch of Apple's much-hyped iPad in the US last week, industry insiders today revealed that the technology giant is testing a Julius Malema-targeted device tentatively called the iPedi, a hand-held touchscreen interpretive device for translating imperialistic Western concepts into Pedi.
Gemini May 21 - Jun 21
It’s tough being alone this week, but remember, he didn’t leave you for that tart because there was something wrong with your heart or soul. It was because your breasts are too small.
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